His Gal Friday: Top 10 Favorite "Bad" Movies

We all have them. Sometimes known as guilty pleasures, although I don't feel much guilt about anything on this list, especially the top 3. What I was going for are films that have low Rotten Tomato scores (pretty universally hated by critics) but also don't have a lot of goodwill out there amongst the common man either. Will not include critically eviscerated films that have since gone on to become much-loved cult classics like Newsies, Mallrats, Empire Records and (I would include) She's the Man. There has to be an audience that thinks these movies suck too. (And Twilight is just too obvious a mark even though I really quite enjoy the first one.)

10 - What's Your Number? (2011): I think Anna Faris is really funny. Yes, she can be a bit too much and while she doesn't have "methface" there is something wrong with her mouth that I can't quite place. But in a movie, she gives it her all. Nothing is too ridiculous that she won't try for the laugh. Here she plays a woman trying to find her husband from among her previous 20 sexual partners because she doesn't want her number to get any higher. She slept with some real duds. She faked an English accent for the entirety of one relationship. And when she tries to resurrect it later, it tumbles into Cockney, then Borat and painfully goes on forever. Laugh my ass off every time. And Chris Evans is in it too and they play a sexy game of strip HORSE. Very flawed, but very funny.

9 - Heavyweights (1995): This is how I like my Ben Stiller. Craaaaazy eyes. A fairly generic and formulaic story about kids at fat camp banding together against the fanatical new owner. Kind of a less inspired The Mighty Ducks. But Ben Stiller is brilliant as Tony Perkis. The script has a few genuinely great lines. Plus, I love Lars, the German counselor. Heather and Emily, say it with me now: "How ya doin, little Tony?" "Bad." "Why do you feel bad?" "Because everythings's falling apart and I can't do anything about it! It's not my fault!"

8 - Major Payne (1995): Kind of in the same vein here. Misfit kids with shared goal of taking down their leader. But in this case, their leader is Damon Wayons and underneath the ridiculous phonetics of his speech, he actually cares. And he gives us the most terrifying version of the Little Engine That Could that I have ever heard. Monsters in your closet? no problem, we'll shoot it full of caps. "One - don't you look dumb! Two - look at you! Three - don't you ever make jokes about me behind my back or else I'll stomp you into the ground!"

7 - Housesitter (1992): Goldie Hawn has a one night stand with Steve Martin and then moves to his hometown, moves into the house he built for the girl he actually loves, and tells his parents that she is his wife. And because it's Goldie Hawn, I don't find her psycho in the least. They spend the entire movie making up grandiose stories, he with the hope of proving to the girl of his dreams what a great husband he would make, she with mostly just a desire to cause chaos. It's pretty stupid actually. But it cracks me up. Hawn and Martin have great chemistry and are phenomenal comic actors, even in shit like this.

6 - Center Stage (2000): Most of the characters in this movie are played by actual dancers, so you have to excuse the absolutely horrendous acting. Focus on the dancing, please. It is spectacular. Especially the sequence where a lead ballerina makes 3 intricate costume, hair and make-up changes in mid-performance without ever leaving the stage. And try to ignore actual actress Susan May Pratt giving the 2nd worst line reading in the world: "I am the best goddamn dancer in the American Ballet Company. Who the hell are you?!? Nobody!" (1st is obviously Andie MacDowell's "Is it raining? I hadn't noticed" in Four Weddings and A Funeral.)

5 - Hook (1991): Yes, it's kind of dingy. Yes, Julia Roberts was a terrible choice to play Tinkerbell, especially as in love with a Robin Williams Peter Pan. But you can't fault Dustin Hoffman's Hook one bit. Or the inspired casting of Bob Hoskins as Smee. Or having an imaginary food fight that becomes real. Or having the new leader of the Lost Boys sport a red mohawk and be named Rufio. RU - FI - OOOOOOO! I like the twist that Peter Pan grew up and can't remember, and the scenes at the beginning of Grandma Wendy (Maggie Smith) trying to tell him are magical and scary. So much better than it's given credit for.

4 - Gidget (1959): Cheeseball movie for sure, but Sandra Dee is such a darn cute spitfire as Gidget. She is relentlessly cheerful and naive, but full of pluck and determination and smarts. She's not out to score a fella (though she does succumb to the machinations of the romantic comedy eventually) - she wants to surf and be one of the guys. Cute score, James Darren was a dreamboat and I'm a sucker for the image of ease in 1950's California.

3 - Far and Away (1992): I've honestly never understood why Tom Cruise's Irish accent gets such a bad rap. It's not great, but it doesn't distract me from the movie. I think he and (at the time) wife Nicole Kidman have an easy chemistry together (and she is quite funny too), Ron Howard shot a film with beautiful visuals, a lovely score, accurate set design and the credits close with Enya's "Book of Days." What's not to love? The penis under the bowl jokes? The amped up boxing? The edge of your seat land race?

2 - Across the Universe (2007): Perhaps trying to tell a story about 6 characters where their entire storyline is constructed from what Beatles songs you had the rights to was a bit ambitious and a slight misstep. But the songs and the singers are lovely. Fantastic renditions of "I've Just Seen a Face," "If I Fell," "I Wanna Hold Your Hand," "Helter Skelter," and "Let It Be." Amazing visuals, even when they skew heavy-handed. Great actors, uplifting story. At least it really tries. Balls to the wall tries.

1 - Speed Racer (2008): This movie is a treasure. Cheesy, long, occasionally tone-deaf, but revolutionary visuals. A storyline that is begging to be mocked, and yet somehow draws you in. Exciting, well-shot action sequences with engrossing races. The editing of the final race alone is masterful. I know the film had to fail in theaters when pitted against Iron Man, but why it failed so massively on a critical scale I will never understand.